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Be the Chihuahua by Chris Redding

            My degree is in journalism and for about 5 months I actually worked in that field. Did I crave the hard news? Nope. I loved the feature stories, but I went at them with no less vigor than I did the breaking stories.

            Frankly, people’s jobs are interesting. I once spent a half an hour on the phone with a guy named Ted E. Behr (no joke)  talking about effluent. It was fascinating because he found it fascinating.

            What does that have to do with being a Chihuahua?

            Well I always warn my interviewee that I will keep asking questions until I either get an answer or understand what the person is telling me. I liken it to those little dogs that grab onto your pant leg and won’t let go.

            Gotta admire the little guy’s persistence. He’ll hang onto your pant leg and he only weighs eight pounds.

            And I think this is a great attitude on many levels for a writer.

            First you have to be persistent and finish the damn book.

            Then you have to learn all you can about writing and how to make your gem shine.

            And of course you have to submit. No matter how many rejections, you have to keep polishing and keep submitting. Until someone says, “yes.”

            You must write another book. And another. Until you write one that someone wants to publish.

            And when it is published, you have to get out there and network with your readers. You have to do signings. You have to do workshops.

            You have to be persistent.

            Especially because lots of people around you won’t be.  I’ve seen writers come and go and never get published. And it wasn’t because they couldn’t write, it was because they gave up.

            So be the Chihuahua.

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The Grass is Always Greener by Debra Mullins

Today I read a blog where agent Nathan Bransford of Curtis Brown is running a contest so his readers can be an agent for a day.  He got the idea from the way people were commenting about agent responses.  I thought the contest was an interesting idea, and it got me to thinking.  The grass always seems greener on the other side of the fence, doesn’t it? 

That green grass  metaphor brings to mind the concept of published authors versus unpublished.  I’ve been both, and as an unpublished author I dreamed of the day when I would sell my first book.  The validation I would get from that.  A sale from a real publisher would say to the world, “Yes, you can write!”  As an unpublished writer I could write what moved me without worrying about the marketing aspect.  I could take as long as I wanted.  I could get lost in the story.  Green grass, truly.  But the down side?  The part where the grass starts to get kind of yellow?  People didn’t consider me a “real writer” because I wasn’t published.  I still had to prove myself. 

On January 26, 1998 at around 4pm I sold my first book to Micki Nuding at Avon Books.  The manuscript had been an RWA Golden Heart finalist, and I had approached Micki at the 1997 RWA conference in Orlando to pitch the book.  She asked me to send her a proposal.  A couple of months later she called and requested the full manuscript (and was still laughing on the answering machine message—she really liked my funny pirate drama).  Then in early January 1998 she called to tell me that she had sent my manuscript to her senior editor to read but the carrier had lost my manuscript (the package came open) and could I send another one? 

No brainer there.  I sent off another one with fingers crossed, since sending it to the senior editor means she might want to buy it.  Then she called me on January 26 to offer for the book.  And that quickly, I went from being unpublished to published.  

But I didn’t know what was in store for me as a published author.  Your life as a writer changes.  The validation is wonderful and the money sure doesn’t hurt, but then you are swept up into the business of publishing.  Suddenly there are revisions, page proofs, cover art, royalty statements, and option books.  You have to learn all of this language and go through the stages of production that turn a manuscript into a finished book that can be sold in stores.   

You have to do revisions based on your editor’s comments (you can call your editor to discuss the changes she wants if you disagree or have questions).  You have to STET the copyeditor’s remarks that you disagree with (this means telling the printer to ignore those changes), and you have to read your book again in page proof format to look for typos or errors (you are limited to fifty changes in the whole book because more than that costs money to fix).  You have to hope when you open up that envelope or email containing your cover art that everyone’s hair color is right.  And that first royalty statement?  Good luck if you can understand all the numbers and jargon! (Royalty statements are famous for being hard to understand).  This is a lot of stuff, but my grass is still green.  Maybe a little trampled… 

And then there’s the option book.  Now that your first book is in the works, you need to start talking with your editor about what your next book is going to be.  And when you are going to turn it in.  Is six months enough time? 

Here’s where that green grass starts turning kind of yellow.  Six months?  It took me six YEARS to write, polish and sell my first book.  But in commercial fiction, no publisher is going to wait another six years for a manuscript.  There are lots of writers out there.  The publisher liked your work, but they can always buy another writer’s manuscript to fill the slot if you can’t write another book within the next twelve months or so. 

Fill the slot.  How coolly businesslike.  As if your work, your opus, your singularly individual creation is just a product.  But it is.  This is a business, and there is always another writer standing in the wings, longing for the shot to become a published author.  The writing game becomes about sales figures and sell-throughs and bestseller lists.  It can be very easy to get caught up in all that.  Very easy to get discouraged, to lose sight of that fire inside you that needed to write to begin with.  Very easy for that green grass to turn brown.

So you need to balance.  Yes, you need to pay attention to the business end.  You signed a contract and you have to deliver.  You need to perform all the tasks involved in producing that book.  But when you negotiate your delivery dates (a.k.a. deadlines), take into account the amount of time you need to produce a good book.  You need to learn this to survive in the business, to continue to be published.  How long does it take you to write a book?  How much down time do you need between books?  You MUST take that time to refill the creative well.  If you don’t, you will end up staring at a blank screen wondering why you ever thought you could write. 

And finding yourself here is where the grass becomes not just brown but completely dried up.  

Yes, I can tell people that I am a published writer—even though they still ask me where they can find my book, as if I sell them out of the trunk of my car.  But there is a part of me that longs for the freedom that came with being unpublished.  To take as long as I wanted to work on an idea.  To go weeks without writing if I wanted to.  To write whatever weird thing I wanted without worrying about how to go about marketing it.  

But I’m hooked now.  I’ve sold thirteen books to Avon.  I can’t stop, even if I wanted to.  The drive is still there, the need to tell that story.  The need to keep that validation, to be successful.  To not fail in doing what my soul compels me to do. 

So the trick is to tell the stories I want to—but make them marketable.  Take the time I need to write the book—but keep it within a reasonable timeframe for the publisher.  And most importantly, when I am doing the actual writing—the part where I wake up at 6am to write for an hour before having to leave for work—I don’t think about the marketing.  I don’t think about the deadline.  I am lost in the story.  I am once again that organic writer, feeding that storytelling flame. 

And that is where the grass is always green.

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Contests: Good Promo or Bad Gamble? by Jacquie Rogers

Authors are responsible for most of their own promotion now, moreso than any other time, from what I’ve been told. I doubt that will ease up any time soon. The successful authors of my personal acquaintance have spent considerable time and effort on publicity. These authors are on or near the NYT Bestsellers list, so don’t think self-promo is for small press authors only.

Bottom line is, I believe every author should learn as much about promotion and marketing as she can, and be willing to do whatever it takes to sell books and earn name recognition. There are many avenues–blogs, social networks, online classes, postcard mailings, spamming your friends (no, I didn’t really say that!), and of course, contests. Most of us choose a variety of these in our marketing plans (you do have a plan, right?), including contests. Today, we’ll discuss what makes a successful contest and how to go about conducting one.

Good Promo or Bad Gamble?

I do think contests are an effective way to build your mailing list and garner name recognition. I’m not so sure it sells books, but as the saying goes, we’re using our current release to sell our next book. Is that true? Don’t know. But I do know if your goal is to build your mailing list, a contest is a jimdandy way of doing it.

(Question: Is it still okay to say “jimdandy”? Or is offensive to someone or something? If so, forget I wrote that, please.)

One thing I learned early on was not to get in over my head. Lesson 1: I have a super hard time getting things mailed–don’t know why, but I’m missing that gene. Luckily, my sister is good at it and agreed to take over that part. I bought business cards with her name and the title “Contest Coordinator” before she could change her mind.

So get the practical, physical aspects of conducting the contest under control.
Who will design and code the web pages?
Who will code the messages for online promotion?
And what is the plan for online promotion of the contest?
(You do have a plan, right?)
What are the prizes?
Who will package and mail the prizes?
How will the contest be conducted?
What timeframe? In conjunction with book release? Or a holiday?

Yes, it’s a lot to think about, but all these considerations and more go into the decision to run a contest. There isn’t enough space to go into all the items in detail, but I’ll touch on each of them.

Contests are nearly always run from the author’s website, and for good reason–to bring traffic so the contestant might be lured to buy a book. A website is the best bang for the marketing dollar, and to make the most of it, we need a dynamic site, not static. Contests are a good way to draw readers. But who’s going to code that page? If the author codes it herself, then that project has to be coordinated with deadlines, copy edits, and all that. If not, she has to be prepared to pay. Either way, website changes don’t happen magically or for free.

Same with online promotion. I’m on over 100 yahoogroups, and of those, probably half are readers loops or promo loops. There’s even a yahoogroup that tracks romance promo groups and sends you an announcement each day of what you can post and where called Promotion Loop Schedule. Again, this takes coding (because you don’t want to send amateurish promos), and it takes time to post all those messages–so again you have to weigh the time involved with your writing schedule.

The plan? Yes, before you even start, you have to decide what kind of contest to run, how long it will take, who’s going to do what and when, and what is a reasonable budget. This is a business, and good business requires planning. Write it down and record the schedule on your calendar.

What are the prizes? More is better–either more expensive, or more prizes. Either will get you more entrants than giving away one download. The prizes do need to be commensurate with the scope of the contest; e.g., if your marketing is limited to emailing, most people will never know about the vacation in French Polynesia you’re offering. Save the vacation for a nation-wide print campaign. Download of your most recent ebook? That’s also iffy, because the people who want it are probably the same ones who would buy your book anyway, so you may have just lost a sale. I like to offer my friends’ books. This gives me a chance to give them a little free publicity because they’ve helped me so much, and it also gives me good publicity, so a win-win situation. And I offer my book to them for contests, also.

Okay, one more paragraph about prizes. I recently ran a pet pictures contest and I was amazed at the really awesome pet pictures people sent in. So I told everyone that “we” would mail them something, whether they won or not. Except I sort of forgot to mention it to my sister. This is not a good thing, I learned, unless one enjoys having knots thumped upon one’s head. So don’t change the rules in the middle of the game. Make sure everyone knows what’s going to happen and when, and make sure they have the money and supplies to get the job done.

I’ve conducted three kinds of contests: scavenger hunts with other authors, two different types of voting contests, and then the join-my-mailing-list contest where the winner is chosen from the mailing list. By the way, if you want to join mine, you have to put up with Princess Keely, who runs Keely’s Contest and News Group. (Hint: she rather likes being called “Princess Keely” and has her own myspace page as well.)

Scavenger hunts have resulted in lots of hits to my website and lots of subscriptions to Keely’s group. (Caveat: too many authors and too complicated searches will put off entrants.) Pet pictures voting resulted in the most website hits and the most inquiries about my latest release. The join-my-mailing-list contests didn’t give me a lot of website hits, but quadrupled the number of members on the mailing list in one month.

The last thing we’ll discuss is the timing of the contest. Every romance author has a Valentine’s Day contest, it seems (including me). Do you want to plan your contest then? Or sit it out? I’m thinking this year I might sit it out and have a St. Patrick’s Day contest instead, just because there won’t be so much competition for PR. If you’re having a winter holiday contest, you’re best planning it to be over by mid-December, if not earlier. People are too busy after that to pay much attention. Make sure you schedule your contest to get the most attention to your books and your website.

Hmmm, we haven’t had a contest on Keely’s Contest and News Group lately, so at 11:59pm Pacific Time a week from today, I’ll draw one name at random from the group. All you have to do is be a member, or join if you’re not currently a member.

That said, I’ve already broken a rule because my sister doesn’t know about this. Oh boy, I’m in trouble now!

The winner will receive a signed copy of Down Home Ever Lovin’ Mule Blues. Sorry, but USA shipping only.

Good Luck!

Jacquie
Down Home Ever Lovin’ Mule Blues (See the Book Video featuring Justin Saragueta)
Jacquie Rogers *** Myspace *** Twitter *** Facebook
Faery Special Romances *** Book Video
Royalties go to Children’s Tumor Foundation,
ending Neurofibromatosis through Research

Read a book by Jacquie Rogers

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Light My Fire: A Review of Amazon’s Kindle 2 E-Reader by Carolyn Martin

Al Gore lives on my shoulder. He whispers in my ear while I’m doing laundry (“Cold water!”), driving (“Inflate your tires!”) or snuggling with my husband (“Turn off the light!”).

Al is never more disapproving than when a box of books arrives on my doorstep. “Oh, your carbon footprint!” Al sighs. “How much fuel was wasted shipping those books? And don’t get me started on the paper!”

Killjoy.

I recently silenced my inner Al by investing $359 in a new Kindle 2, Amazon’s next-generation e-book reader, beloved by Oprah and untold (because Amazon refuses to divulge the exact number) thousands of early adopters.

Here’s a review of the Kindle 2 from the viewpoint of a reader, not a tech wizard.

The Skinny: Product Specs

It’s nearly inconceivable that 1,500 books can fit onto the 10.2-ounce Kindle. At 8” x 5.3”, approximately one-third of an inch thick, the sleek, slender device easily slips into all but the smallest purses. The battery fully charges in three hours, and Amazon claims a single charge can last two weeks with the wireless radio turned off or four days with the wireless on.

The Kindle uses black “e-ink” on a gray display screen (slightly darker than the paper in a child’s coloring book) that is not backlit like typical computer screens. As a result, the Kindle has no reflected glare, is perfectly readable in full sunlight, and is far less likely to cause eyestrain than a computer. However, unlike a computer, the Kindle cannot be read in the dark.

A reader “turns pages” by pressing a button on either side of the device (a bonus for lefties). When “pages” are “turned,” there’s a brief flash as the e-ink repositions itself. Some find the flash annoying, but after a few minutes, I didn’t notice it. An indicator at the bottom of the screen tracks the reader’s progress through the book, graphically and as a percentage.

Purchasing Content

Currently, the Kindle Store sells over 250,000 titles, as well as subscriptions to major national and international newspapers, magazines, and blogs. Kindle content expands every day, as Amazon executes its ambitious plan to ultimately stock the Kindle Store with “every book ever printed in every language.”

The Kindle Store is accessed through the device’s wireless radio (no need for a computer hookup) anywhere there’s a Sprint wireless signal. Before purchasing a book, readers may download a free sample—usually a book’s first chapter or a complimentary two-week subscription to a periodical. A simple click completes the purchase, and the price is automatically charged to an Amazon-registered credit card. Within 60 seconds (usually faster), the wireless download is complete.

Kindle books cost about 50% less than a typical hardback (a savings of $10.00-$15.00) and 20% ($1.00-$2.00) less than a paperback. A randomly selected textbook (Mass Spectrometry by Jürgen H. Gross) sells for $57.56, or 42% less than its $99.00 cover price, leading one to wonder when e-readers will become the norm on university campuses.

Content Availability

How many of Kindle’s 250,000 titles are up your alley? It depends. A virtual stroll through the Kindle Store reveals depth in some areas, gaps in others.

The Kindle Store features 103 of the 111 books on the New York Times Best Seller lists, and the more famous the author, the more extensive the backlist. For example, Kindle sells 106 titles by horror king Stephen King and 63 by romance titan Nora Roberts, but the backlists for less well-known writers can be spotty.

Kindle’s library is by no means limited to contemporary writers. In fact, it’s hard to beat Kindle’s price for public-domain classics: the complete works of Shakespeare cost $3.19, all six Jane Austen novels only $1.59, and Dickens’s 16 novels, an astounding 99 cents. Who could resist that? Not me. Click!

Many popular craft books are also in Kindle format, including On Writing by Stephen King; Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott; Screenplay by Syd Field; and Fiction Writer’s Toolkit by Bob Mayer.

But if you’re looking for Writing the Breakout Novel; Goal, Motivation and Conflict; or the most recent edition of Elements of Style, you’re out of luck—for now.

Other features

Technology enthusiasts can spend hours poring over the Kindle User’s Guide (sensibly pre-installed on the device). But for amateurs like me, here are the highlights.

Adjustable type: Any book can now be converted into large print, thanks to Kindle’s six adjustable font sizes. This feature alone makes it worth a look for vision-impaired book lovers.

Text-to-speech: Kindle’s text-to-speech feature has inflamed authors and publishers, who fear it threatens audiobooks (and the accompanying royalties). They needn’t worry.

Since I have the maturity level of a twelve-year-old boy, I first tested the text-to-speech application on a sex scene in Sea Witch by Virginia Kantra. The scene was super-hot when I read it, but creepily bizarre when recited in the Kindle’s emotionless, robotic monotone. It was like getting an obscene phone call from Stephen Hawking.

In addition, Prof. Hawking sometimes can’t “read” the text properly (translating the honorific “Ms.” as “millisecond,” for example).

So relax, everybody. Kindle’s text-to-speech is okay in a pinch, but will never replace a well-performed audiobook.

Audiobooks and music: (Real) audiobooks from Amazon’s Audible.com and music files can be downloaded to a Kindle, although they consume an inordinate amount of memory.

Built-in dictionary: Highlight the unfamiliar word and—voilà!—up pops the definition from the free, pre-loaded dictionary.

Search functions: Type in a word or phrase and the Kindle provides a list of occurrences within the document. With a few additional clicks of a tiny toggle switch, readers can also search Google or Wikipedia for more information.

Other features: Kindle offers many other features, including the ability to save “clippings” from books and periodicals, type notes in the “margins” of documents, bookmark pages with a virtual dog-ear, and download Word, TXT, HTML, image, and pdf files.

Pros and Cons

Is the Kindle right for you? Consider the pros and cons. On the pro side, the Kindle is user-friendly (I downloaded my first book within five minutes of opening the box); ridiculously portable; and a pleasure to read, indoors or out. In addition, the Kindle Store mimics Amazon.com’s first-class purchasing experience, then does it one better with its ability to deliver a book in less than 60 seconds.

Other pluses: savings and environmental considerations. Between the $10-15 savings on hardbacks and $1-2 on paperbacks, serious buyers can break even in a year. And e-books are infinitely greener than conventional books, though the Kindle’s plastic casing and battery aren’t impact-free.

Finally, don’t discount the very real, if very shallow, cool factor. Whip out a Kindle and crowds gather (mostly men—hurray!).

Kindle cons include its steep price, its available-only-from-Amazon content, and, for readers who enjoy the feel of a new book and appreciate cover art, its rather joyless, utilitarian reproduction of the printed word. In addition, the virtual purchasing experience has its hazards: without an armful of books or an internet shopping cart tally to remind you of your literary gluttony, it’s easy to lose track of your spending. And if you share books, buying a Kindle will effectively end that generous and frugal practice.

A Final Note

I love my Kindle. I highly recommend it to anyone who buys lots of books, has back problems from lugging around their personal library, or covets cool technology. Of course, the Kindle isn’t the only game in town—Sony Reader aficionados extol its lower price, sleeker design, convenient touch screen and read-in-the-dark back lighting, among other features. So do your homework before making an investment in the future of books.

But if you do decide to buy a Kindle, use this link and Liberty States Fiction Writers will get a $35 referral fee for each Kindle purchased!

Liberty States Fiction Writers Bookstore

And one more thing:

As of this writing, An Inconvenient Truth is not available on Kindle.

Your move, Al Gore.

Questions about the Kindle? Thoughts about the future of e-books? Leave a comment and let me know!

Carolyn Martin is a former senior communications executive for a Fortune 100 company. Now a freelance writer/editor and pre-published author, she’s catching up on twenty years of deferred reading.

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Can You Get a Ticket for Reckless Driving When Using Creative License? by Gretchen Jones

Recently I took an online class for writers on serial killers. One of the instructor’s goals in this course was to educate authors on the psychological realities of serial killers and the criminal justice professionals to promote accuracy in their portrayals. I can see how fictional accounts could annoy someone in the know.  I get that way when I hear people waxing poetic about Krispy Kreme donuts – As someone who has worked in the donut “biz”- it’s my professional opinion that their whole philosophy is wrong.  But that’s a subject for a different blog.

I had submitted the scenario I’m currently working on to the instructor, to see if it was “flawed” per her comments.  She responded that she didn’t want to get into analyzing characters but… then she had some comments for me that gave me serious pause about my characters and their motivations vis-à-vis reality.  Which is why I took the class in the first place – to get her expert insight.  

So then I made a squinchy face and despaired for a moment over how adopting her suggestions would impact my current plot.  Admittedly I am not an expert on serial killers and she certainly is.  This resulted in another squinchy face and considerable grumbling.  Then I had an epiphany. I didn’t have to make any changes at all.  It’s fiction after all. Intellectually I know that you can choose whether or not to adopt the recommendations of a critiquer but emotionally when someone tells me that my stuff is “wrong” I feel compelled to fix it. It’s a character flaw I have. Hello, my name is Gretchen and I’m a “fixer”.

That got me wondering, what exactly is the responsibility of the author to represent characters realistically in fiction?

My initial thoughts were that it is necessary for the characters to be minimally plausible.  If they aren’t, the book is subject to wall banging and that can’t be good.  So I asked a few authors I’m acquainted with to see what they thought their responsibility was to portray reality in fiction. 

When I asked the question “Exactly what does creative license entitle you to do?” here’s what I found.

Fiction is a little bit like magic.  We use “slight of hand” in an attempt to fashion characters that are believable, interesting, and that readers can identify with.  In the case of serial killers, or certain other “villains” this is particularly difficult.  Most real life fiends are motivated by emotions and a chemical makeup that the “non-fiend” never experiences.  The average reader just does not have the biology to understand or relate to how the worst criminals think and justify their actions.  So in an attempt to align our characters with our reader’s experience in a way they can appreciate, we take liberties with their behavior, motivations and goals. 

The downside is that you run the risk of alienating those people who do have experience with the type of villain or victim in real life.  I think it takes a really skilled author to pull off something that reflects real life and isn’t a boring rehash of historical events or clinical facts.  It may be easier and more plausible to grossly exaggerate reality beyond the experience of the typical reader.  For example, I never heard anyone say Stephen King’s villain in his novel Misery, was too over the top. Readers loved it.  Probably his experience in light of his celebrity made that character all too plausible to him.  I can imagine that William Shatner would have had much the same reaction to King’s book given the legendary enthusiasm of Star Trek fans.  If the author believes in the character’s villainy and has the skills to tell the tale, the reader is likely to accept the premise.  Even if the characters color way outside the lines of reality.

As authors we also have to contend with issues of creativity and originality.  In order for our work to not be derivative it is sometimes necessary for us to take a walk on the wild side and use ideas that dangle from the edge of a cliff in order to surprise the reader. To give that element of suspense we take risks with our characters and have them do things that are unexpected, original.  How can an author do that if not by treading the fine line between creating characters with actions that are outside the norm of everyday experience, while using motivations that remain relatable to our readers, or ourselves?  

Everyone I asked seemed to agree that there are limits to creative license.  Characters need to be plausible, believable, and have motivations that the reader can at least accept.  Certainly that is the “happy path” to publication (notice I didn’t say easy).  To that end most writers do at least some research into the topics they address in their fiction.  Their efforts honor the subject matter. Much like the author writing about a character who was an adult survivor of child sexual abuse.  Her concern with “getting it right” showed a sincere appreciation of the problem and a forthright attempt to avoid demeaning the victims of abuse while telling a compelling story.  The story is not about survivors of sexual abuse, it’s about vampires, human beings, werewolves, or other humanoid creatures and what makes them tick.  The sexual abuse thread was simply one facet, much like the case of the adult survivor in the real world.  The sexual abuse does not define them.  It is a single aspect of their character. Fortunately, I’m not terribly worried about insulting serial killers, though who knows, maybe I should be? Let’s hope not.  

There are those among us who take another kind of risk by choosing not to exhaustively research.  They may focus their stories on other elements using the un-researched aspects as an underlying theme rather than loading their prose with potentially implausible details.   They concentrate the reader’s attention on the emotional impact of the interaction between the main characters and de-emphasize particular events that put the characters in peril.  

That same writer might produce such lively and outrageous stories that the reader is distracted from being critical of the details.  Whether it’s likely that a character would sit still long enough to be killed in a particular manner is inconsequential if the other details around the murder are so flamboyant as to deflect doubt about the character’s actions. Does anyone question the likelihood that that another of Stephanie Plums cars has exploded?  As a reader I was surprised and delighted but never questioned it when she loaded a pack of monkeys in one of Ranger’s SUV’s.  Of course she did.  When Claire fell through the stones in Outlander no one cared if the laws of physics supported the premise of her journey. They were focused on the character’s problem of being a modern woman in an 18th century world.   That slight of hand takes considerable skill to achieve, and the willingness of the reader to accept the illusion.

So to answer the question, yes, you can pretty much count on being ticketed for reckless driving when using creative license.  But that shouldn’t keep you parked at the curb.  Risk is part of the business of writing fiction.  Exactly how much risk are you able to tolerate and how well you execute the maneuver will determine your success.  Regardless, writing will always fall under the category of – you can’t please all of the people all of the time – no matter how carefully you steer between the orange barrels.

www.gretchenjones.com

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Embracing Foolishness by Kiersten Hallie Krum

Happy April Fool’s Day! And a very merry unbirthday to me! My actual birthday is in August, but as a young girl, it grieved me that I had a summer birthday when none of my school friends were really around to celebrate. My mother’s solution was to designate April 1st as my unbirthday thus allowing me to have a party during the school year at which I would inevitably receive an empty present or one filled with rocks as an April Fool’s joke.

Cute kids, huh.

Few things are more foolish than the Mad Hatter and his crazed tea party, the origin of the unbirthday status and song (though I maintain that his creator, Lewis Carroll, was a shade too creepy a guy, always excepting his excellent taste for Christ Church, Oxford University). We’re all fools in life at one point or another. Often being foolish is how we relax, unwind, or celebrate; sometimes it’s also how we learn.

In literature, the role of the fool is often an avatar for much wisdom; the voice of reason couched in a frame of ridiculous. The Grand Master himself, Shakespeare, makes best use of his fools in this way, often covering the actual fool in the patina of wisdom personified either by age or stature. I thought particularly of Shakespeare’s Lear this past week as Sir Ian McKellen immortally brought his performance to the small screen via PBS. Lear conveys the epitome of foolishness when he seeks to barter his kingdom for his daughters’ love. His youngest daughter, Cordelia’s, response illuminates the lack of wisdom in her father’s actions as she refuses to quantify her love. “Unhappy as I am, I cannot heave my heart into my mouth. I love your majesty according to my bond; nor more, nor less.” Lear counters further on, “So young, and so untender?” Cordelia responds, “So young, my lord, and true.”

Cordelia’s one of the original romantic heroines to my mind, forsaking the easy road to stay true to herself and to her own notions of love and loyalty. Mind you, she’s killed in the end, but at least she caught her prince first. Priorities.

I would wager that we all know the sensation of heaving our hearts into our mouths whether in fear, grief, or when surprised by joy. No doubt we’ve all offered our hearts to lovers at one time or another or felt them drop, or even stop, with attraction or desire. Surely we have all been fools for love.

And if we haven’t, well by Jove, sure our heroines certainly have. For surely that is one of the greatest pleasures in being an author of romantic fiction, to allow our heroines to plunge through the heights and depths of romantic emotion that we too have experienced, or that we hope may someday cross our paths. We’re automatically foolish by profession because we willingly enter into play within a world of fully realized locations and people as real to us as our own families. Indeed, we are compelled by our creative writing natures to do so.

To be an author is to be a kind of ridiculous fool and to impart much wisdom by being so. As writers, we can be foolish in creating historical romances and explore the complexities of Medieval or Regency gender roles. We can be foolish in writing western adventures and revisit the untamed passion, raw courage, and fierce uncertainty of the American frontier. We can be foolish in word building paranormals and wonder at social hierarchies amongst demons, werewolves, and vampires. We can be foolish in “chick lit” with the single girl in the city looking for love and discover the burdens and identity issues facing young professional women of today. We can be foolish in mature romance and reveal the beauty of second chances.

All wisdom revealed from our foolish play.

Good news! We can also be foolish in the myriad ways our heroines (and heroes!) achieve their final happy endings.

Where’s the fun without that?

So I say to all like-minded fools out there – enjoy your special day.

Kiersten Hallie Krum is a pre-published writer of romantic suspense fiction who is often foolish for many things. During the daylight hours, her secret identity works as a pharmaceutical advertising editor and a back cover copy writer of romantic fiction. She anxiously awaits the right agent/editor to make her dreams come true. Read more of Kiersten’s thoughts on writing and the world around her at www.twolftshoes.blogspot.com

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Married at 8 by Carolyn J Coles

My first marriage … I was 8 years old and married my father’s younger best friend, Bill Abner. He was so nice to us kids. I had three brothers and a sister. He would buy whatever toy we wanted from the grocery store while he picked up items Mom needed for dinner. Mr. Abner was a regular Sunday dinner guest at our house after Church. I remember all five of us kids would ride home with him from Church and make Mom and Dad go home together alone. Now, that I’m older … it must have been the only peace and quiet they ever received. Probably thinking about poor Mr. Abner stuck with those loud noisy kids. One Sunday Mr. Abner let me give the directions home … I told him to turn left or right and he would do so. Well, we ended up at the country club where he and Dad played golf. He told me then that I was his “kind of gal”. I beamed as love bloomed, at least for me.

When we arrived home my best friend Mindy Conover and her family were there for dinner too. The Conover’s lived two doors down the street on the same side as my home. After greeting Mindy I announced to Mr. Abner that I would marry him some day. Well, he thought he’d call my bluff – and said how about after dinner? Mindy piped up and stated she wanted to marry him too. I told her no. She would have to marry someone else since Mr. Abner was mine. I wanted him all to myself. I was overruled. Mr. Abner said he’d marry both of us. Mindy and I ran upstairs to dress for our wedding. I had a sparkly princess tutu from ballet recital that I put on over my clothes and wore my half slip on my head for the veil with my tiara on top. I dressed Mindy in Mom’s full slip for a white wedding gown and one of Mom’s half slip for a veil. She didn’t have a tiara. I grabbed the cut flowers from a vase in the upstairs hallway for our bouquets. We took our time strolling down the stairs decked in our finery so our future husband would be surprised. Thinking about it now, it’s a wonder all the adults kept a straight face. God only knows how they did it …. but they did. Mindy’s father performed the ceremony and Bill our new husband packed us off in his car for our honeymoon at Dairy Queen. He said we had to take off our wedding attire before going inside. We were so thrilled with our bridal dresses and veils we wanted to wear them everywhere. Sadly, we compiled. It was our choice we could have anything on the menu. I chose a large hot fudge sunday with chocolate ice cream. Mindy had a banana split and our “husband” had just plain vanilla ice cream.

After our honeymoon ended, we went back at my house. All the adults were still there talking together while our husband played board games with his new brides and their brothers. When it was time for him to leave … I decide I’d go home with him, after all we were married now. He told me I wasn’t quite old enough yet and that I needed to stay with Mom and Dad – for school. He promised to come and get me when I was old enough to be a real wife to him.

The trouble was … I had forgotten all about being married when I turned 9. It wasn’t until I was 15 sitting with Mr. Abner and his new wife that I remembered being married to him. I looked over at Mindy who was sitting next to me, we were always together, and reminded “our husband” that we were still married and now he had three wives. His latest wife, the real Mrs. Abner, laughed so hard when hearing of our wedding and honeymoon, tears were streaming down her face as she wrapped her arms across her abdomen. Mr. Abner was grinning too at the memory and said, “How about I take all my wives to Dairy Queen.” Of course, it was like a trip down memory lane with all his wives laughing and giggling.

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You’re either going to love this or you’re going to hate this. by Kathye Quick

Believe it or not, the concept for Cynthia and Constantine, my new release from the Wild Rose press, sprang up during a season of American Idol.   

I work for county government and we have several satellite offices around the county.  Once a month seven of us get together to have lunch.  We call it the Lusty Ladies Lunch Group.  Other times we keep in touch via email. 

During this particular season, Bo Bice and Constantine Maroulis were competing.  Two of the Lusties choose these guys as their favorites.  While we didn’t agree on who should win that season, we did all agree that they had ‘romance book cover’ hair; the long and flowing kind of hair usually depicted on Knights in Shinning Armor on historical romances. 

After one particularly hot and heavy day of emailing (after our constituents were served, of course) I went home and wrote a small piece about a knight meeting his ladylove.  The next day I sent it off to the Lusties and got requests for more.  Well one thing lead to another and I began to serialize a story about Bo and Constantine as knights in the Arthurian days.    I named my hero Constantine and his lady was Cynthia, one of the Lusties.  I gave Sir Constantine a brother, Sir Braeden and named his lady, Jane, another Lustie.   

The story just evolved on a weekly basis with email scenes going back and forth until I had 100 pages.   

I thought that was the end of the adventure until I decided to flesh out Constantine and Cynthia’s story and turn it into a 55,000-word book.  I was fortunate enough to have the Wild Rose Press expressed interest in the novel and then publish it. 

And yes, you’ll either love this or hate this, but the antagonist of the story is named after one of the American Idol Judges.  I’m sure you can guess which. 

There will be a sequel to this book called Jane and Braeden because in the course of fleshing out the story so it would be long enough for a book, Jane’s character became an integral part of the story and now we need to hear her story also. 

The moral of this story is that you never know when or where inspiration is going to sneak up and bop you on the side of your head.    In my case it was with a microphone on Fox-TV.

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Back-Door Love Story by Carolyn Martin

What happens when an aspiring author is seduced by her hero’s best friend?

Something bad happened in the middle of my first book.

I always considered myself a one-man woman. And my book’s hero-graced with strength, looks, and an unerring moral center-was so perfect I thought he was everything I’d ever want in a protagonist. I would never stray. Never.

But then-poof!-his best friend appeared on the scene.

I didn’t pay him much attention at first. I only had eyes for my first love. But the best friend was always there on the margins. Always ready to help the hero pull off a narrow escape or point out the heroine’s strong points-the ones my hero was too stubborn to appreciate. Always the right man to supply some timely exposition or a much-needed slug of whiskey.

He was…different. More smart-alecky than my hero, the best friend had just enough humor to break the tension in a nail-biting moment, just enough skill in masculine trash-talk to make sure my protagonist never got too full of himself.

Just enough character to make sure I couldn’t ignore him.

And then one day I…I…

I checked out his backstory.

I took a good, long look.

And God help me, I was attracted to it. It was strong and well-rounded and very, very sexy.

I fell head over heels for my hero’s best friend! And it got worse-soon I was downright obsessed, stalking the best friend through my hero’s story, finding him in places he had no business being.

I had to spend more time with him. But not in my novel-his growing presence there was too disruptive. We needed someplace private:  a new password-protected document just one window over, easily hidden with a single click.

Tucked away in our top-secret file, the best friend’s charm and sensuality tempted me beyond words. Actually, it tempted me to lots of words. Just a few hundred, I promised myself. Just a few hundred words to satisfy my curiosity. Then I’d return to my hero and forget I’d ever fantasized about his best friend.

But a few hundred words became a thousand. Then five thousand-ten! I lingered for sentence after addictive sentence, ignoring my original hero and wishing with all my heart I’d met his best friend first.

Can you blame me? The best friend was more fascinating, funnier, more carnal than my original hero. Certainly less demanding. The closer I came to finishing my first hero’s book, the more he wanted from me. He insisted on logical explanations for all his actions-and everyone else’s too! Sometimes things came out of his mouth that made no sense whatsoever, and I’d waste a half-hour translating it into standard English. And did he ever, ever thank me for how I kept his book nice and neat, tying up loose ends with every word correctly spelled, every line grammatically flawless and all the scenes organized into perfectly paced chapters? No!

My hero didn’t appreciate me any more. He didn’t care what I wanted, what made me happy. It was all about him-him, him, him!

His best friend wasn’t nearly as needy. He was always glad to invite me into his novel, for however long I cared to roll around in his rumpled paragraphs or rub up against his dangling participles. I could climb through his window whenever I wanted, even in the middle of a sentence. He was so thrilled to be on the receiving end of something only I could give him-his own book-that he never complained. Meanwhile, he gamely continued his supporting role in my first novel, never hinting there was anything untoward behind his sly smiles. My second novel was our little secret. The thought of syntax never crossed my mind.

I’d meet him in the oddest places-at Starbucks, by the neighborhood pool, on the kitchen table. Even while my kids were watching SpongeBob in the next room!

“Mommy’s coming!” I called from the office as I teased out a final, mischievous double entendre before shutting him down for the night. I’d chance anything to explore all the naughty, naughty things he could do in my laptop.

It was exciting. It was intoxicating. It was madness! I was throwing away a perfectly good book to cavort with a new one.

“Are you crazy?” a writer-friend screamed over the phone. “If you get involved with another novel you’ll never finish your first one! You can’t flit from book to book like some little…”

She bit back her words before she said something hurtful, but her sigh spoke volumes.

“Don’t do it,” she said softly. “I know what I’m talking about.”

That sad note in her voice forced me to consider the consequences of my reckless actions. After all, I’d made a very public commitment to my hero-I’d told everybody I was writing a novel. What would my friends-Oh, God, my family!-think if they knew I was not only abandoning my hero, sometimes for days, but also hooking up with someone else? And his best friend, of all people! What kind of author was I?

There was only one solution. I had to find him a girlfriend-fast.

Someone spunky. No-someone uptight, someone who wouldn’t find his snark as amusing as he did. Someone who’d resist him-at least for a while-better than I ever could. A woman who’d give him a taste of his own medicine.

I set them up to meet cute. Sparks flew, along with an unexpected dish. (How was I supposed to know she had a temper? I just met her myself!). And then, just pages into their tempestuous affair, the most astonishing thing happened:  my back-door lover became just like his best friend, my original hero, now jeering from the sidelines of this new story. The best friend was still to die for, but he turned out to be as frustrating and time-consuming as my first love.

I guess I had to learn it the hard way.

So with the best friend distracted by the woman of his dreams, I crept back to my first book, a bit older and much, much wiser. To his credit, my hero never uttered a single reproachful word. And my heart had indeed grown fonder during our break. All those traits that once drove me nuts-his murky motives, his occasional inarticulateness, his infuriating tendency to tell, not show-were easier to deal with, even a little endearing. Sure, he wasn’t perfect; what hero is?

But before I fully recommitted to my first novel, I made sure the best friend had something to remember me by-a detailed storyline so he wouldn’t get lonely while I worked things out with my original hero. As thanks for the lessons he’d unwittingly taught me, I gave the best friend everything he ever wanted-the fiery girl, a rollicking family, the whole nine yards.

Maybe it was too pat, but it eased my conscience. And everything went back to normal, except…

Except…

You know that cheeky orphan the best friend and his new wife adopt at the end of their story? In twenty years or so, I suspect he’ll turn out to be quite the hero himself-gorgeous, resourceful and more than a little dangerous.

Wait a minute. It’s already twenty years later-in the new file I just created.

Only few hundred words, I swear.

Carolyn Martin’s original hero stars in her historical western Something Fierce, which placed third in the Music City Romance Writer’s 2008 “Melody of Love” contest for pre-published authors. Her hero’s best friend is still bumping around in his own file, waiting for his turn in the spotlight.

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Books on Craft by Melinda Leigh

Face it. Most of us do not have unlimited funds to attend workshops and conferences on a regular basis, especially those of us who are yet pre-published. So what do we do to improve our technique and therefore increase our chances of getting “the call?”

I’ve recently finished two incredibly helpful books on writing. The first is Syd Field’s The Foundations of Screenwriting. I know what those of you who haven’t read his book are thinking. You write novels, not screenplays. Mr. Field is a plotting genius. He lays out the foundations for a story so simply, in such a plotting-for-dummies kind of way that the only thought running through my head as I read his book was “duh.” Why didn’t I see that before? So that’s where my book should really begin or end or climax or whatever.

After this epiphany, I started on Debra Dixon’s Goal, Motivation & Conflict. Where Mr. Field’s book shines on overall story structure, I found Goal, Motivation & Conflict to be most helpful in developing individual characters and scenes. As in do I need that scene? Or darn it! I spent four days on that scene and it stinks. How do I save it? What is my character doing in this scene and why?

Does anyone else have recommendations for excellent books on the craft of writing? What do you like about them?

Melinda Leigh is an award winning pre-published author of romantic suspense.

http://www.melindaleighauthor.com